Shocking Showers

Some people reading this may find it shocking that there are people that don’t shower every day. I have been in many discussions with BiPolarians / people suffering Depression. They have mostly said that they hate showering, that it is a chore and they will put it off for as long as they can.


Neurotypicals are probably thinking “You don’t shower every day? Why don’t you shower every day? That is so unhygienic. Ewww.”


For us it is very typical not to shower every day and avoid showers for as long as possible. Showering is a chore; first you have to take off all your clothes, then you have to get the water to the perfect temperature, then you have to get in, then you have to wash your hair and soap your body and brush your teeth and wash everything off and brush your hair and then comes the biggest hassle of all which is drying yourself; dry every inch of your body and dry your hair and then having to do something with your hair and then you have to put new clothes on, or just put the same clothes you had on before, but you can’t because they smell because you didn’t shower!

Is it worth the effort?


Do YOU feel that when you are down a simple task like showering is just too much?


Rock Bottom

What is rock bottom? What does it feel like? How do you get there and how do you get out?


Everyone is different.

One of my rock bottoms was my second breakdown. I was lost, my whole sense of self was gone. My worth was gone. It was dark and scary and everything seemed pointless. Everything hurt and was numb at the same time. Nothing made sense. I didn’t exist. The walls were pushing in and it felt like there was nothing to hold on to.


I have BiPolar 1 so it is easy to spiral up or down and hard to stop (without meds and professional help). I feel I have hit rock bottom many times but that’s when things got interesting…

When you are at the bottom there is only 2 ways out. Give up or Dig up.


I clawed my way back out of the darkness many times but I couldn’t have done it without helping hands.

My family and a few close friends; one being Lithium. My doctors were great.

But a lot was me. Fighting to survive in a world I don’t often want to be a part of, but I will not let this beat me. I will not let the darkness take over. I am resilient. I am stronger now for rising up from rock bottom.


I know not everyone has the support I have and it is hard to pull yourself up. But you can, you are, just by reading this and other mental health pages.


How many of you have come back from rock bottom?

What was it like down there?

How did you get out?


Please share your stories in the comments section. Let’s support each other and say ”NO” to giving in to rock bottom!



Change can be good and it can be bad and it can be scary and it can be hard.

A good change could be a nice new haircut or rearranging your furniture or making a new friend.

A bad change is when someone leaves and you have to adapt to life without them or a medical problem that impacts your day to day activity.

A scary change is starting something new and unfamiliar like a job or new meds and having no control over what changes will happen next.

A hard change can be a behaviour change like quitting smoking. First you must want it, be willing to do it and be able to do it. But it’s hard work, trust me.

I don’t believe when people say that “People don’t change”. Whenever I reread my first book I think “who is this crazy girl? That can’t have been me! I would never do that.” It was me and I did do that, but I have changed now. 

From my experience if you want to change you can or at least can try.

Also in my experience most people can change but they don’t or won’t. 

(Especially men!)